salt in the wound....

 my heart was broken today.

over, and over again.

i prepared myself mentally at 5:45 this morning after receiving my float pool assignment to the burn unit. "okay KATELYN...this is probably going to be gruesome." 

in all actuality, my eyes didn't have to witness the dressing changes of the most severe burns, but my whole being was overcome with sadness and heartbreak from one patient.

it wasn't this patient's wounds that were the worst of it for me.

when i was told that the patient in "such and such" room was 13, i was enthused. to some this may seem like i have no heart, but in fact it's due to MY HEART....a heart that's still a child itself and loves any interaction with little/younger humans.

i must admit at first i didn't catch on. 

"no one's in here right now, hmm..kinda weird, but i'm sure the parent's just went home for a bit,"

i thought upon first entering the room.

it was late morning before i heard why this 13 yr. old patient's cries and moans of pain during an excruciating wound debridement were not soothed by a loving voice by his/her side.

this 13 yr. old was abandoned in every since of the word.

without anyone.

in the hospital.

for over a week.

with no one loved ones to explain these grown up medical terms.

the parents were both in jail.

the grandmother refused to take of this 13 yr. old any further. 

as it was put in the chart,

"the grandmother states she no longer WANTS.."

today i remembered blessings.

my family.

my GOD.

my longing for adoption and foster care.

and my own brokenness.

how must this beautiful child feel?!?! no wants them???

  are you kidding me?!?!

are you crying yet?

i'm welling....

in fact today....it hit me a couple of times.

yes, this kid is rough around the edges, already curses like a sailor, and called me stupid b/c i couldn't play a game right, but i saw something else.

i saw the face of a human being.

a child.

an orphan.

an image of God.

my heart is still aching. i'm going to take the next twenty minutes to pray for this lost child of God solely.

if you're reading this.....please take the time to pray for this individual too.

i can't reveal anymore specifics due to patient confidentiality, BUT the beautiful thing is that the God you're praying to already knows this one's name.

pray for healing. emotionally and physically.

for an unconditional love shower.

for hope.

for encouragement.

for wisdom for those who will be placed in their life.

for the hospital staff.

most of all for THIS little one.